Coping with Stress

What is stressful to you?

Right now, my family is the biggest cause of stress in my life. My parents have always held me to very high standards when it comes to things like grades, and even now, when I’m away from them at college, their overwhelming desire for me to do well makes itself evident every time I talk to them on Skype. My mom, especially, has always been a tiger mom, involving herself needlessly in my extracurricular activities. I understand that their actions come from a place of love – and believe me, I love them both back – but they are, beyond a doubt, the biggest stressors I have to deal with on a daily basis.

What are some ways that you cope with stress?

I cope with stress primarily through exercise. I find that going on a nice, long run or a swim really helps clear my head of all of the stressful garbage that floats around in it on a day-to-day basis. That clarity helps me figure out how to best address the things in my life that are stressing me out. I also enjoy doing things with my friends when I’m stressed out, whether it’s seeing a movie, playing video games, or sitting around, having a drink and talking my issues out.

Are your ways of coping with stress effective or ineffective?

For the most part, my coping methods are effective. Exercise always works for me; I never feel like my problems are that problematic after I’ve exercised. However, my social coping method doesn’t always work as well as I’d like it to. While it’s pretty much guaranteed that I’ll have a good time when I hang out with my friends, they serve as more of a distraction from my problems than a way of handling them head on. Even when we sit down and talk, my friends make more of an attempt to cheer me up instead of helping me deal with my problems more systematically. I’m grateful, don’t get me wrong – I just wish that they would be more willing to actually help me in processing my issues instead of just making me feel good.

Are any of your coping skills putting you at risk? If so, how?

Relying too much on my friends to help me solve my problems is potentially risky behavior since hanging out with them is more of a placebo than an actual solution to my problems. I also have a greater tendency to drink when I’m around my friends, which is an unhealthy way of combatting stress, as outlined in Chapter 11. When I drink to stop worrying, I am not only ignoring the problem at hand, but also potentially setting myself up to engage in addictive behavior, which could prove very detrimental to my health down the line.

Are you thinking of modifying any of your coping skills?

After reading this chapter, I think I might try to cut back on using drinking with my friends as a coping method. While hanging out with my friends is always a good time, and drinking with them is pretty routinely fun, combining the two is potentially risky behavior. I’d prefer to not deal with the negative health consequences that can come with drinking and being stressed if I don’t have to, and an easy way to avoid those consequences is simply by not combining the two activities.

Reference

Rathus, S. A. (2013). Stress, health, and coping. Psych (3rd ed., Student ed., pp. 91-93). Belmont, Calif.: Wadsworth